[Procyona]

Thank you Tetyana, I'm on it It's a book to read, Valentina.   

[Валентина Слободянюк]

understood thank you Milla   

[Procyona]

Recently I have come back to the topic Irene started here - Can you trust someone teaching you and how much can you trust them.

But, now I am considered in another matter related to this: If there is someone you trust, how can you best learn from that person? Of how deep can the trust alter your actions? Can you for instance copy the teachers manners, like for instance the way she or he adresses a person? What do you think forum mates?

I think that you can learn a lot by trying out different ways of life and see how you feel of them. But to continue with a manner, you would need to be sure you do it for the right reason - blindly following does not give results. In my opinion, the best way I can learn from a person - any person - is to pay attention to what he is doing, and also how you feel in that situation, watching or copying that action.   

[Gra-ach]

I think you learn stuff like manners, addressing and so on not because you trust a person per se, but because you respect him/her and they inspire you with their example to become a better person yourself. And because you respect this person you usually trust them, because I can't imagine someone really respecting someone else without trust.   

[Procyona]

True point Irene! I think you cannot have one without another - once you trust the person, you also respect him/her, and the other way around. Why do think this is so? For my opinion, respect and trust are so intervined, that they are part of something bigger. I don't know how I would name the bigger thing though   

[Gra-ach]

I think you're right about bigger thing It's not just trust and respect that makes you want to behave in certain situation in a certain way. I think it's also holding this person in a very high esteem and he's a role model in some way. And you definitely like the way they behave and the results they achieve with this kind of behavior. But like you, I can't think of the "bigger" word which will combine all these.   

[Procyona]

Well, if we want to have all the three ascpects, doesn't being a role model summarize it quite well? Once you have a role model, someone you want to become like, you respect them, and therefore trust them. And because they are some what ahead of you on the thing you want to become like, they are admired, too.

But, I also think you would need to know the role model in person to have a greater bond. It's good to have role models you can view from far away, but if they are nearer to you, closer to skin, you can trust them even more.   

[Haveunique]

[Procyona]

The other day a friend asked me if you can trust someone to do something without the trust turning to expectation with time. For instance, you have found someone who loves you, and you can either trust to that love, or you can expect it.

I think the difference between these is that with expectation you only see one option of things, while with trust you agree that there are other options, but still choose your actions according to how you think/trust them to be like. (For instance, you trust the shirt you laid down to be in the same place you left it, even though someone else living with you can move it, or you might remember the place wrong, right?)

That is how I see it, but is there any other views? Also, how do you think expecting and trusting differ? Thank you!   

[Gra-ach]

I think that when you expect something from someone it means that you think he is obliged to you to do this thing. But when you trust someone to do something, it's because you believe that he will do this thing out of the goodness of his heart not because he thinks that he has to do it. Something like this.   

[Procyona]

That sound very true. Thank you for your wisdom Irene

Now that you mention it, expectations are kind of like binding you to a certain event or situation. And when something else happens, you freak out. But with trust you can freak out the same way as well. maybe it's the amount of trust that then matters. I trust the sun to rise tomorrow, but I also trust that my fridge works, and I have clear water.

By the way, how does assumpition differ from expactation? Is that a milder version of the same thing? Or maybe assumtion is a theory based on facts, when expectation is based on a feeling.   

[Gra-ach]

[Procyona]

[Gra-ach]

[Procyona]