[Gra-ach]

Sometimes you just need to learn things which other people think you should learn. It's the discussion I'm having with my students every semester: they are asking me why do they have to learn my subject if they don't have a place to apply it at the moment. Well, my answer is that (1) you don't know what will you be doing tomorrow and maybe things you've learnt so far will ease your way next and (2) there's no such thing as useless knowledge, people just don't apply it

What I was refering to in my post was actually learning to do things wrongly, like walking straight towards the opponent and not sidestepping him. It's so much harder to find 45 degrees angle if you get used to going at right angle or something.   

[Haveunique]

Ira, your post rose a topic, clearly different from the concept of balance where you posted it. In order to do things just because someone thinks you should, you need to trust that person.

How do you choose who to trust and how do you earn other people's trust?

To my mind, trust always comes with actions and their results. Thus doing things together is the best way to learn to trust someone and earn their trust. Especially keeping in mind that trust is giving some responsibility to another person and taking off that same part of responsibility off yourself.   

[Procyona]

Thanks for the great topic Tetyana and Irene

For me, trust is somewhat related to respect that we have discussed earlier, even though for me a deeper trust is harder to gain than respect. Like with respect, you need to be able to trust yourself before you can trust others.

Before I can trust someone, I need to know him or her well enough, not nessesarily timewise, but characterwise. There are different levels of trust, according what kinds of promises I can expect the other one to keep, and if are they able to handle information or tasks I ask of them. It is also about the trust in my own decision to trust, and take responsibility if things do not work the way they should.

I can gain other peoples' trust by trusting myself and with my actions that reflect my self-trust: keeping my word, be a genuine person and do tasks I have promised to do.

By the way, giving your trust to a person also makes them trust themselves and take more responsibility.   

[Gra-ach]

[Procyona]

[Haveunique]

With parents, Milla, it all depends how they raised their children, so it's a very individual matter.

About following - I really wish it was that easy In order to make conscious choices a person needs to be aware. Aware, conscious actions only can be a base for trust, that's my opinion.   

[Procyona]

[Haveunique]

[Procyona]

So to you Tetyana, if I got it right, following to you as a conscious choice is based on trust? But I think we can also follow even if we are not conscious of the choice.   

[Haveunique]

Yes, Milla. If it is not conscious, it is not our choice   

[Procyona]

I see. But if it is not your choise, are you responsible for it? More over, what things can you be in response of? Thank you!

For me, things like following or acting can be unconcious in a way that you are not aware why you choose it, but also that you have other options. If you act only on what you think you must, is also a choise, as well as not choocing is. I think that there is always responsibility when there is a choice made, and because I am responsible for my actions, I am choosing all the time, was I conscious or not.   

[Haveunique]

Milla, it can happen so: we don't like something in retrospective and there is a tendency to say, it wasn't my choice. Well, if I was the one to act, it was my action, meaning my responsibility... even if I chose it not consciously, but out of fear, ego or laziness...   

[Procyona]

Indeed, ego and fear are very tricky in this respect, and they try to make themselves look like they are something else interily

Talking more about consciousness, it is true that actions like following or mimicing can be conscious, but can trust it self be conscious? To me it seems to always be unconscious, more or less rising by itself.   

[Haveunique]

Now I see the time has come for a special task for you, Milla check your e-mail   

[Валентина Слободянюк]

interesting, what kind of task?) is it someyhing with consciousness and subconsciousness?)